“I just love to go to bed with that guy,”
He said turning to a man he had seen for the first time (claimed the reporter) but Perry was honest they claimed.
“I don’t want anyone to tell me I am a battyman I know this from I was small as I would get an erection each time I saw a boy in brief (underwear) but my mother who is a Christian, was a fool to that. She adored me so much I felt sorry for her sometimes.”
Perry describes his early years as “tempting for man” but he kept far from danger.
“I knew a number of men loved me but I was afraid to lose my virginity. I heard it was painful.” But he said the love of men drove him further into temptation. He went through teenaged years without having sex and when he was 24 a man he met at the beach gave him a “blowjob”
“I was swimming and he asked if he could have oral sex with me, I was nervous, said it was alright and he did it to me. It was nice, but I felt guilty as I walked through the door that day and saw my mother. She never realized what had happened and I wouldn’t tell her for a million dollars.”
Perry said he never experienced the moment again until he met a gay from Fletchers Land. “He was the rough type, but sexy with hairy legs. I knew he could work well in bed because other gays told me that. I remember going to his house and passing his friends who were ruffians. He made me sex him and I just couldn’t deal with the effect it had on me later.
It was as if I was losing my mind as I walked home, I lay in my bed, couldn’t imagine how a nice boy like me come to fuck batty . I didn’t have anyone to tell and I promised myself never to do such nasty things again”
But Perry said he could only resist the gay feeling for some time.
“I met another guy, a teenager but we never had sex. We could meet at nights and kiss. One night we stopped at this abandoned building and he had to fight off some dogs. My lover got bites but I was skilful not to get a single scratch. Then I remember the two of us kissing when a man shone a flashlight in our face. He remarked ‘a mean seh the two bwoy dem a battyman’
Perry said he began to meet men who had money and he became greedy.
“I wanted furniture and pretty clothes and although I was working I went for it. One of the men came from Waterhouse, he would pick me up from work on Fridays and I spent the whole weekend at his home. He wanted me to sex him like six times in one night. I never know one could take so much ....... one night we had sex several time. I was tired but he wanted more. So kept roughing me up and that made me real vexed. We left but I got some real expensive furniture from him.
I also met a businessman who drives a Pajero, at first he said he wanted no sex and would give me anything I wanted. But that was a lie. We were going to Mobay one weekend and he jerked me off about six times. I couldn’t help getting rough on him and told him to stop it. So we broke off and he kept calling me promising to give me an expensive car if I agree to spend one good night with him. But I am afraid of this man, his private part is too large.”
Perry has met several other men through telephone calls, men he claimed have proposed to marry him. He showed the reporter an engagement ring he was wearing.
“This one is for a man in the United States. He send my barrel with clothes regularly. But he a eediot (idiot) cause if him come to Jamaica he cannot find me.”
‘Mi caan believe mi eyes .....” (reference to Bounty Killer's antigay dancehall track)
These were the words of a 27-year-old heterosexual male as he made his way from the Enoturage gay club. Not only was ‘Fren’ (not his real name) approached by several men who wanted to start a relationship with him; one man gave him his full name, work and home numbers for him to call. (Fren was not told he was going to a gay club and only knew after, he was told to play the game so that the reporter could get his story).
“Yuh know this (expletive) place want to burn down.” Fren said as he turned onto Trafalgar Road. If Fren had known about this place he would not have gone there. He disliked gays so much he would beat up any of his classmates who showed the slightest signs of being effeminate.
“The man dem nuh easy eeh, yuh see the type a car they drive and the man who seh him affe go home to him wife and him children. A wonder how him feel to know he is keeping a man with his wife?” Fren who is usually the quiet type could not keep his cool. “Is a lot a man come to look me. Supposed I fi tell my badman friend, dem would laugh at me. The first one ask me if I was taken. The second wanted me to come home with him, a wonder if they know mi a bad man” he said, one wonders if it was just usual Jamaican embellished bravado coming through as a cover.
Why so much passion?
According to the reporter it may sound strange but they surmised that gay men believed that the love of a man towards another is stronger than that of a woman. This they say gay men are quick to murder their lovers who are unfaithful to them, an often misplaced belief of jealousy in gay on gay violence, but the naivety of the reporter is clear here.
According to the reporter the gays at the Entourage easily recall how many of their own have been murdered, throats cut, penis slashed, stabbed twenty-odd times. Most of them were murdered in their apartments, a belief that has come to define dismissing homophobic claims sadly and this obviously inexperienced reporter is only seeking to reinforce such misguided perceptions. The murderers were never found as police seem disinterested to investigate one of the few good facts presented here. One man supposed told the Star News he would have committed himself if he had not turned a blind eye to his cheating lover.
“I knew he was cheating on me while I was at work, the day in question I went to his apartment climbed a tree and sat there until he drove in with one of my friends. I felt hurt as I heard the door close because I knew they were having sex. I took out my knife ready to slit his throat but I remember my mother and father and the grief I would have caused them”
He said he sat down and spoke to his lover and they made up.
Talk to other gays and one gets the feeling they would not take the situation lightly.
“That man deserve him death, that’s why a lot of them life end up that way, you cannot take yough fi eediot,” one said sipping a beer. Another gay man took up the conversation, “When are hurt we can’t cuss and carry on like women. When our man seeing another man we can’t go to their workplace and create a scandal so we take it the hard way.
“We can’t even cry so all that jealousy come out in the worst violence. We don’t care how he die, in fact we gays like to watch him die slowly, a few stabs now see him bleed and another few stabs and then let him feel the suffering we feel.”
In conclusion though I wonder if some of this is only aspirational revenge in a sense as the helplessness some gays feel in terms of retaliating to Jamaica’s homophobia such violent thoughts that cannot find an outlet to be sent to those who should get it is left to reside within the gay community, the reporter though is clearly naive as hinted to before, but how did a reporter get into the club in the first place, where was the security checks and balances and how were they not able to screen these faces and just let them in simply because they may have paid the admission fee.