More MSM teetering on homelessness

Traditionally there seems to be still very little concern over how we treat with the least amongst us even as today is viewed as International Day Against Homophobia and Transphobia, with the receding impasse with the MSM homeless group in New Kingston dissipating somewhat as the men scatter in various directions and Jamaica AIDS Support and Jamaica Forum for Lesbians Allsexuals and Gays, JFLAG are officeless for now not to mention other displaced and homeless LGBTians across the island who struggle, more confirmed and unconfirmed reports continue to literally pour in to my email, on Facebook, by phone, Blackberry messenger or fielded by other influentials as well as other persons out there who are getting requests for help from mostly men who have found themselves exposed out on the front-line  What is more disturbing is that some of the persons involved do not want to report their issues to the existing agencies, a trust deficit that seems to have deepened as the homelessness crisis issue played out on the airwaves over the past four years plus and the feeling that they men in some part were abandoned. Persons so afflicted seem not to see the need to bother making any reports as they feel they won’t be helped or that there is favouritism involved as well. This does not auger well for any service NGO or group at all as persons must feel the need to want to come to said groups for assistance or interventions when required. By virtue of this emerging mistrust yet again the true impact or closest approximation of displacements and indeed homelessness may never be known as such persons suffer in silence.

The latest case coming to my attention is one nearing the Jones Town region of a seventeen year old teen whose father (mother is ill) decided he has to go since March of this year as he cannot afford to apparently raise a battyman (gay man). This new found resolve by the teen’s father came on the heels of an incident from last year with the young man and another teen in the housing scheme where an argument between the two stemming from an accusation of both young men suspected as being lovers and which also involved an alleged girl friend of the other party which has allegedly left the father of the teen being teased relentlessly at a bar he hangs out that his son will not produce him any grand children, whispers and verbal spats at the teen as he traverses the scheme and so it seems out of pressure from others he has capitulated. The displaced teen fears his father may physically abuse him so he only goes in at night when he can and does not enter the home but relies on the more openness of a cousin who may pass him some food items and clothing when he needs it but he has been staying at a friend’s but that time is soon ended as the host is asking for his space and costs are escalating.

It was only a few days ago I posted an entry on community based shelter assistance being available despite the costs and risks involved, many persons these days after hearing the horror stories of others who have opened their doors to help coupled with the perception of rowdy behaviour (a perception aided by the recent rejection in essence of the homeless groups in New Kingston by JFLAG and JASL over four years plus) the decision is made easier not to get involved at all and open their homes to help. Remote assistance may come from some who provide purchased cooked meals on weekends or second-hand or new clothes and shoes occasionally especially when nearing an upcoming LGBT event but as for a roof if only for however short a time the answer is usually a resounding No! The arson attack that occurred in the Waterhouse region last year of a popular community drag queen brings into sharp focus the realities out there that in helping certain categories of displaced MSM can come with unneeded consequences especially where profiling of persons is still a catalyst for homo-negative/phobic attacks. A more affluent gay man has picked up on this and despite the first anniversary of the murder of a former ally who also assisted me some time ago financially in providing help for persons who I came into contact with genuine reasons/cases he is researching and assisting where he can. One has to be also mindful of those who fabricate alleged forced removals and so on to play on the sympathies of concerned persons like myself, I too have been bitten by that deceptive practice but I certainly over time have developed ways of checking, rechecking and verifying such reports.

Owing to the fact that NGOs were also set up to deal with the welfare issues as well in the population not just the legalise of repealing buggery, in a previous podcast where I explored the leadership concerns post the eviction notice given to the aforementioned agencies I highlighted the unofficial residential crisis intervention as done by co-founder of JFLAG the late Brian Williamson way back in the nineties who used his own business complex as a temporary shelter for some persons where he could even as he ran a gay club and rented office space and overseeing all of that. Continuity is a missing element in terms of building on what has worked for future fallouts. Even I was the beneficiary of such temporary community based shelter assistance from a departed friend of mine who opened his apartment to me for just over a year after my own brush with the police and the law in November 1996. My own family became aloof towards the public revelation of my sexuality, buggery allegations and relations were tense for some time before it settled but not without arguments, fights and non speaking moments, so I clearly understand the place where some of the young displaced persons are at. It was not an easy road to recovery and bearing in mind agencies such as JFLAG did not exist at that time nor LGBT related counselling so I had to do so in a slow painstaking process of self re-discovery and sheer determination bearing in mind I still reside at my old address where this all came out and have not left Jamaica.

I have offered my spare bedroom here at my house before since the passing of my father in February 2012 as many other ordinary LGBT folk also do at times but some of whom can no longer do so for directly homeless persons due to escalating costs and an ever shrinking income, maybe for someone who is still employed or have some limited income to contribute to the expenses, donations generally are not as fast and as frequent as before and as more persons become insular as well you find that networking to intervene in cases such as this is less available. With the new figures as well on unemployment by the Statistical Institute of Jamaica, STATIN one in every three persons between the ages of fourteen and thirty five (post graduate level included) is unemployed as at January 2012 or about 37% and is said to rise, included in that are younger LGBT people who are either studying full/part time at some tertiary institution and or working or on student loans. The residual effect can be seen on Facebook especially on certain job search and career groups/pages but in LGBT groups or pages it is clear as more and more persons reach out openly for assistance with job seeking or employment wanted status messages as a starter. A recent open cry for help one of many others before in a Facebook group where JFLAG operatives are members went unanswered openly as the individual repeated the call and by the looks of it he was not privately messaged either when I engaged him. I have had several private messages as well and feel so helpless in responding as how there should be given the age of the struggle versus the resources and funding allocated over the years.

Unconfirmed reports also suggest the population mentioned in the introduction that for the most part were staying in New Kingston and at the rear of the former JFLAG/JASL offices have had some challenges of verbal and physical abuse by persons, that option of illegal occupying the premises does not exist anymore as guards are posted there now and the new owners take over. The supermarket staff for example where it was reported that some of the gay men had barged in and tried to rob have vowed some retaliation, while other allegations laid at the feet of the men turned out to be concocted by other non MSM miscreants in the business district as well who use the glare of the men’s bad reputation to carry out criminal activity, it is hard to report hearsay but given our culture of the grapevine if it does not go as reported it is exactly that. Other persons in the meantime have been struggling with job loss hence reduced incomes and as personal finances dwindle so does the lifestyles of those persons. Persons have been evicted by landlords or fear such action for owed rent etc with no immediate outlet for recovery. The fallout as well from the state’s crackdown on the illegal lotto scamming which some MSM are alleged to be involved seem evident as once “rich” persons have joined the street cohort of displaced and homeless. Same gender loving women also have been seeing some challenges as well according to an ally in that section of the population, stereotypical profiling in reverse if you will where a butch identified woman was said to have been relieved of her job as she was alleged to be too aggressive to her former female boss.

Other cases that myself and others have been tracking number four as other persons try to intervene and one was reported to JFLAG, the outcome of that one is still unclear but the young men involved have been getting by for now, how long they will remain displaced and not move over into full homelessness is another matter. There are some older cases from last year that are also ongoing but at the displaced category, others have been meandering between being displaced and homeless as no proper life skills knowledge is at hand the minimal feeding program that one NGO claims to regularly provide does not address the psycho social issues nearly enough, the young man for example who stayed at my home for some days is still moving around and has a temporary job for now but instability can be a challenge by not having a roof over ones head. Talk therapy, temporary shelter and food by themselves address the immediate needs but the psychological, emotional and long term needs are another matter especially when the assistance is not buffered with expertise to help the individual return to some level of independence. The St Catherine populations have seen some temporary help come their way but only for five persons by an interfaith group out of the estimated twenty plus, that religious group is also struggling with some theological, ideological and indeed anthropological issues as they engage the men but refuse to directly engage the more effeminate members of the population, some find shelter at a popular revivalist’s centre but cannot stay for extended periods and their movement is heavily restricted to avoid nosy eyes as per the host’s instructions, the landscaping activity that the lucky “masculine” five have been doing with loaned weed whackers is losing traction as the dry season reduces vegetation growth hence no lawns to cut for income.

Western Jamaica namely Montego Bay and its environs have seen the aforementioned fallout from the lotto scamming crackdown as well, according to reports from influentials on that side of the island things are not looking so rosy for some persons and a police raid nabbed three persons just this week. Other challenges include the access to medication namely ARVs/HAART for HIV+ members of the group.

Solutions at the community level seems to be an open option still after all these years when more strategic programs to address this business of displacements that pre-dates any struggle for LGBT rights and recognition in the first place are obviously missing and should have been in place given the amount of programs written over decades, anecdotal information is available just by the oral histories from older gay men who from memory hint to forced evictions though not as frequent and as caustic as today yet very little improvement has come in that department. When will we see some proper responses to this perennial problem when it has always been one of the most visible evidence of hate for MSM in this country?

Please help if you can.

Peace and tolerance

H

Male student accused of spying in boy’s bathroom attacked

A male fourth form student of a prominent high school in Kingston is now recovering after an attack by other male students last Wednesday May 8, 2013. Confirmed reports to Gay Jamaica Watch and a follow up conversation with his mother said that around twelve noon at the school just before lunch time the young man was said to have cried excuse just nearing the end of his class period to use the bathroom, he was granted the leave to do so but when he entered according to what other students told his mother when she arrived at the school he entered the urinal section of the lavatory and used it however another male student who initial accused the boy of spying and who eventually caused the mob to descend on him was mum when called to explain the origin of the accusation.

Other boys descended on the accused and proceeded to reign blows on him but it was not an easy task as the student in question is very agile and tall and masculine acting so it was a challenge at first to subdue him then to enact their brand of discipline as it were for “battyman tings” The young man’s mother via telephone said she was distraught but glad it did not escalate any further that it did and that her son was able to escape the mobbing attempt. The shouting match ensued in the bathroom for about ten minutes before it came on the outside and had it continued to the lunch period which is 12:30pm it may have gotten worse despite the accused physical advantage. A chair was said to have been thrown from a floor adjacent and above the passage from the bathroom but it missed the student by some inches reportedly, verbal abuse reigned from other students who were also at the vantage point where the chair was thrown.  

It was last year as well that another male student at a different cooperate area school was attacked but he suffered serious injuries and was kicked down the stairs and beaten with sticks and old pieces of school furniture. That matter was investigated by the police but seems to have not gotten any further. That student has been removed to another school after a lengthy hospital stay according to reports. The matter of cruising bathrooms by curious teens is something that is not discussed at the advocacy level that I can assure you neither it would seem at the guidance counselling levels within the schools either as the forward thinking that should occur just does not. The withdrawal of the Sexuality manual from the schools’ curriculum simply due to a section on anal sex, homosexuality and a guided imagery exercise on role reversal homosexual/heterosexual is another clear reason of this backwardness at the leadership and political directorate levels. Oddly the gay lobby was also for the most part silent on this matter as well which just goes to show the limpwristedness I have been critiquing them about, where is the leadership and voices when needed?

I can remember my days at high school and curiosity and the occasional peeking at other boys in the bathroom and from other boys at well after physical education in the showers or at the urinal it was important to keep your under wear on as a rule even as one showers, no genitalia exposure was the unwritten rule, a rule that I came across at my short stay in prison at the showers. There was a glory hole in the boys bathroom at high school surprisingly beside urinal closest to the last toilet stall and all one had to do was position oneself carefully to peek at another’s member. 

Interestingly not only effeminate boys used that stall for such a purpose supposedly but also very masculine aggressive ones too and there was a particular footballer who we “the gay set” observed quite frequently in or by that particular stall, turns out we were right on our supposition of him, imagine my surprise later in adult life to meet him and his lover and several other boys including a track athlete who came out to me at a hotel party 17 years ago, then we are told by our detractors that homosexuality is not innate?.

Bullying and attacks at school due to homosexual allegations has been increasing according to a source close to the ministry of education and in the education system but there seems to be a code of silence on the matter to keep it out of the public domain especially due to the connection to the powerful church groups that run some of the very schools in which they repeatedly occur. The lesbian attack issue last year is a case in point and the misunderstanding of abuse versus experimentation. That matter is said to also been in limbo despite some dialogue and allegations of victimization by a parent of one of the girls accused of being a lesbian where the school expelled her. Abuse is also a problem where other more aggressive females seem to be intent to act out their version of masculine dominance in a same sexed setting as well since in our patriarchal construct dominance suggests or projects power. Bullying in schools cannot be addressed just by flowery press releases and sleek video campaigns but direct engagement and talks with school administrators and the education authorities despite their unease and fear on homosexuality and this misnomer that the lobby is imposing such when the students themselves are obviously innately so.

Fortunately this current matter is being dealt with some maturity according to the student’s mother on the part of the school’s administrators it seems on the face of it the allegations are viewed with disbelief by them at the accompanying “profiling” (my words) and pinging effeminate traits that are missing in their eyes make it unbelievable, she seemed concerned about her son’s safety than about whether he was gay(bi) or not which is OK in the short term but how things will play out afterwards one is not sure. One does not just live down an accusation like that so easily as it can remain for years even into adulthood, persons do not forget such things and what is even more disturbing is that such an allegation can be made on just about anyone out of the blue whether they display effeminate aesthetics/behaviours or not with the usual response being shock quietly transformed into violence as we are perceived as defenceless women want-to-be.

I am praying this turns out well and I am sorry I did not get the chance to speak to the student directly to get his take on the matter. There is an urgent needs for programs for LGBTQ and especially Q – questioning as this is the stage where curiosity is at its highest sexually speaking.  Same sex attraction or perceptions of such at the pubescent level may not necessarily mean homosexuality in adulthood either.

Peace and tolerance

H

Today is Gay Jamaica Watch's Fifth Blogoversary!

Gay Jamaica Watch’s 4th blogoversary

Started in 2008 on May 8th as Sunshine Cathedral Jamaica the blog was a part of an action item following a series of stake holders and management meetings between board and parish committees of the aforementioned church which was a local branch of the Metropolitan Community of LGBT churches in Florida. The aim then was to raise awareness of the SCJ with local as well as foreign supports via an internet presence using an accessible platform little did I know or even perceive then that it would end up where it is today. In that same series of marathon meetings several other action items that were agreed upon and committed to by others were never carried out to this day and the reports remains on the paper or digital file it was saved on as mere archive material. Here is a clip with Reverend Robert Griffin from the mother church in Florida talks about some of the challenges.

Such are the challenges and hence my frustration with the systems of advocacy in Jamaica. The SCJ blog then highlighted theological, introspective and reflectional posts with a view to affirming Christ’s love for all people at that time to including LGBTQ persons as well in Jamaica and seeing we never had a space nor a church of our own to worship it was an opportune moment seized by many who would make the monthly trek to the various venues for such services. The blog also had some entries I as it administrator with some management approval looked at homophobic and other related matters in Jamaica. Readership then was on the rise as with contributions via submitted articles from the then SCJ Chair and church flock alike with some of my musings.

So overwhelming the homophobic violence reports became that the SCJ blog started to resemble a list of infractions towards LGBT people more so than the original intent of God centred principles, quotes and verses with testimony. So I decided to add another blog under the JFLAG name of which there was approval from the then management committee, over time however challenges came my way as administrator of both blogs as my writing style and that of content was not only about LGBT issues such as entertainment, homophobic, lesbophobic, transgenderiism violence but also bisexuality also I took the bold step of critiquing the very advocacy or lack thereof in certain respects in basically the same style as I do today with the blogs renamed from SCJ and JFLAG.

The renaming came about when several differences of opinion as to content became an issue and an attempt to muzzle my writing was the last straw where I decided to rename both blogs to reflect my opinions. The inherent need to control the narratives about Jamaican LGBT issues by the establishment soon became clear and it did not sit well with myself and some of my long time followers who also transitioned with me to Gay Jamaica Watch, GLBTQJA on Wordpress and GLBTQ Jamaica (formerly JFLAG blog) on blogger.

And so the tradition continues with over 1100 posts to include videos and exclusive original content coupled with news stories and my two cents on current affairs matters of the day. No subject seems off limits as over 100 tags bear witness everything from hypermascilinty to LGBT family life to the controversial MSM homelessness issues which I have been following prior to leaving JFLAG fully in 2010 as my contract expired. I since then worked elsewhere and have also been greatly assisted via donations from readers who pitch in when asked for crisis interventions for persons who I come in contact with.

I want to not only continue to express my opinions and indeed that of others as contributed pieces are also shared but move towards far more frontline work than just the investigative aspects in verifying information for entries. Thanks to you my readers Gay Jamaica Watch now almost at 700,000 hits in the four years according to the figures on the Google tracking map and I hope it can garner a million hits soon. Apparently there were some errors prior to the last numbers I saw before. GLBTQ Jamaica in the meantime has more though while GLBTQJA on Wordpress increased by 45,000 last year over 2011, an impressive jump since I recommenced regular entries and audio/podcast embeds on there. Listenership to the audio posts and podcast recordings have also been slowly rising as persons tend to be gravitating to that medium although your noted concerns that the audio is sometimes too long, the urgency of some materials do require lengthy presentations so forgive me.

Persons have been asking to also make the podcasts/audio posts downloadable especially the older ones which I may reconsider soon but for now they are not.

Challenges include:

These include technical ones such as posts appearing in draft sometimes when after correcting errors and spelling, Multiple HTML clash issues with version 4 & 5 and slow loading time which are not the fault of administrators but the blogger platform itself.

Flash player and Skype crashes annoy a few of my readers, again platform related issues

Verifying information that has been reported by shady sources

Meeting the needs of an ever demanding readership for content outside of text for e.g. audio, video and even live streaming requests

The need for more resources such as tools and aids to prepare more digital content

The slow movement towards one of the goals of a related website

The flood of responses via email instead of commenting directly on the blog

The inability to use local parlance far more than normal as mostly overseas readers do not understand them

Anti gay responses and vitriolic answers from other bloggers on the platform

Attempts to soil reputation by surprising persons within the community

The overly lengthy and repetitious responses from a few readers

Competition for news space from overseas stories that seem to attract local LGBT person’s attention and a lack of following local LGBT issues saved and except for the subject matter having shock value or sensationalised. This partly due I feel to our slow divorce from the tabloid press continued tropes over the years on gay matters, after all it sells papers and raises listenership/viewership when aired in the electronic realm.

But all in all I have weathered the storm and for four years, several blog awards nominations both locally and abroad I press on with now four spots each with their own focus. Being one of the first gay bloggers inside Jamaica sharing some of the issues it has been an honour to have done so and I hope to continue serving as best as possible, to be honest I am proud of what has been accomplished thus far, now there are other Jamaican gay bloggers and with the blogosphere creating its own news content mainstream media has sat up and took notice which was what we wanted from the beginning, the recognition of “smaller” voices. Vigilance is key if we are to keep persons on their toes and the public informed of matters that would otherwise be swept under the carpet or hardly looked at.

GLBTQJA on Wordpress - is a compendium of posts from the old SCJ blog, the present Gay Jamaica Watch and GLBTQ Jamaica (blogger) with some exclusive content on entertainment and religiosity.

GLBTQJA on blogger – opened in February 2013 continues the tradition of Gay Jamaica Watch and GLBTQ Jamaica on blogger with emphasis on lesser important stories but exclusives as well on advocacy matters

Gay Jamaica Watch – carries the real hard hitting materials covering advocacy review, homophobia, biphobia, HIV/AIDS matters, Buggery matters, legal issues, theocracy and religiosity, anthropologically tinged entries on hypermasculinty, press releases, effeminacy, studies, videos, party reviews and highlights, Stop murder music exclusives, metro sexuality and entertainment as well as exclusive LGBT Historical entries, audio posts and podcasts with slides and downloads

GLBTQ Jamaica - also with be three years old this year is a more formal look at international LGBT affairs and my position on selected issues, to include asylum issues, letters to the editor, legal changes on same sex laws, European happenings, entertainment, lesbian, Years on review, transgender and bisexual issues, medical matters (to include transitioning), Jamaican/US/UK/Caribbean LGBT Historical entries, lifestyle matters, relationship issues, publications and research and advocacy (or the lack thereof) boosted with videos, slides, downloads, audio and podcast embeds.

Battymantings – is the ex-rated outlet for photos videos of an adult nature for 18 and over.

It has been a pleasure though rough at times serving you my dedicated readers and I hope my attempts to change the way the conversation has been had on many issues about our LGBTQIQ2S experiences has worked or is making an impact, judging from feedback over the years it seems so.

Contact:
lgbtevent @gmail.com
glbtqjamaica@live.com

Tel: 1-876-813-4942

Be vigilant be safe – an old way I used to end my posts with as at the time the frequency of attacks were very high and was the tag on GLBTQ Jamaica on blogger. Thank you so much for your support and remember to tuck a love gift via the donation buttons.

Peace and tolerance

H

Inviting an unverified third party for a hook-up can be dangerous

Inviting an unverified third party for a hook-up can be dangerous

In light of recent events involving fallouts from hook-ups mostly originating from virtual e-lationships I wanted to revisit a long standing practice by some long term relationship same sex couples to open their union or are already in open relationships where a third or even fourth plus parties are incorporated to enhance their sexual experiences and or for experimentation. The recent events I referred to in my opening was related to a long term virtual e-lationship without the benefit of meeting face to face that supposedly built trust due to the passage of time or so one party thought, one of thousands like this scenario I would image but on popular all male site Adam4Adam these e-lationships can last for very long periods before a face to face hook-up is arranged or enacted it can be just within hours after clicking their profile lured by a photo (often times fake) or some other factor picked up over time. The man thought he was about to meet his online friend only to be led into a web of deception and sexual assault.

Now that the outdoor cruising community and related activities has retreated somewhat due to the high crime wave, fear and the presence of the problematic homeless and gay for pay communities occupying traditional spaces using public thoroughfare the switch is noticeable for those who care to look to virtual spaces so the internet, BlackBerry messenger and the respective mobile phone service providers chat rooms with Facebook almost ahead of the pack in my view, even I get the proverbial “ ...wanna jack off?” or other sexual invitations in my inbox. This blog has some previous entries on Facebook fallouts but the main purpose of this particular entry is to provide some more tips and suggestions (not hard and fast rules though) as to how to take the needed precautions and what to look for. Experiences cruisers like myself never often pass on these tips and even at the advocacy level hardly any discourse is on the subject and it is well needed with the challenges especially with younger inexperienced “hunters”

Instincts of course is the first thing when making that decision at the initial contact, many persons do throw out invitations openly online in the fora aforementioned but it is remarkable to me that even persons who would be considered sophisticated, educated or suave seem to be making some serious errors leading to disastrous consequences over the years, the repeated non-homophobic killings is evidence enough as the men navigate the ins and outs of Jamaican MSM life including the tricky gay for pay and hyper masculine individuals not accessing that these persons sometimes come with emotional and psychological baggage on their shoulders. The highly prized machismo in our setting with the masculinisation of down low life as acceptable by the very GLBTQ media/entertainment they have already set the stage for bullshit to happen. Some may want some sort of financial or materialistic rewards for the inclusion of sorts and sexual play so may go as far as asking for extended contact with one of the parties in the union while rejecting the other (if it was a two man union) based on the initial engagement/session. The perception by some of the hyper and GFP brothers also is that “gay” men (as they often don’t seem themselves as homosexuals) have disposable incomes and material wealth in abundance hence the cash register demands complete with a list of wants in rules including the role play in the session strongly excluding any passive or receptive positioning for the most part and if so allowed may cost you more than you bargained for with added confidentiality (friends most not known he bent over) under pain of threats on ones person at times.

Verification is so important as too often persons whether single or in a relationship but looking to turn a session or a have a one night stand into a ménage a trios just play it by air and invite someone right off the bat from a male hook-up site or Facebook without even knowing the individual(s) on the other end of the virtual space. It is good to have spontaneity as well yes and gaydar may also play a role but is more powerful to me face to face, sometimes luck will run out and one cannot simply work by the “spirit” anymore in these dangerous times. Often times we see posts and status messages thrown out on Facebook of persons seeking a certain experience or type of man going down to the details of role played and expected activity, a few have gone as far as to list their geographical area, offer payment amounts or material items as the lure and phone numbers while having an open profile that can be viewed by friends of friends and family who on their main friends list but not filtered from certain account activity. Those are some of the circumstances that can lead to problems.

A recent chat with some fellas in a certain town centre revealed much as many of them have become circumspect as decoys roam either pretending to be gay to exploit what they can from their victim a long standing problem as I too fell victim to this years ago but I am far more the wiser these days or gay for pay MSM who while not self identifying as gay have strict lists of what they want both in bed and in payment. Derogating from any such arrangement can have consequences to ghastly to discuss here some of which we have seen making the news over the years outside of non homophobic killings or murders. Hyper masculine or thug gay for pay men are not the only ones with drama the opposite side of the spectrum can also be murky that of effeminate men hence some seeking such encounters often demand that would be third parties or hook-up link be not “real” “girly” or “ queen” all terms referring to an effeminate man. There are also the service seekers though masculine in demeanour do deliberately seek effeminate types but motive is often an issue. I have seen over time effeminate men abused, not paid (if it was a commercial arrangement), relieved of personal effects or cash or duped into a deal to be left raped or sexually assaulted.

The ability for perpetrators to mask their intent which may come into play after the first face to face meeting is sometimes hard to decipher or detect when one is not vigilant from the get go, the first click on that profile should turn on ones filter’s but some get so lapse and are caught up in the aura of the fantasies or urges running in one’s mind for that instant gratification, after all men work by the physical for arousal more so than women. One also should NOT let their guard down simply because the first meeting or session went well motives can remain hidden just until they are ready to pounce and carry out their plan. Trust cannot be developed out of a sexual encounter without the benefit or more social exchange and meaningful conversations. The thrill of a hook-up or the hunt though we clearly understand is the unemotional connection, sheer lust and raunchy desire driven by male’s physical aphrodisiac elements that are the drivers but in hiding ones true self to make the experience interesting deception becomes exploitive. The six pack (or more), the member’s size (endowment), and other physical attributes are the markers to make the decision to sometimes blindly go for the kill so to speak and when it is over they go their separate ways.

Just the ending of last month there was an assault case that has brought the matter front and centre for myself and some other readers on my sister blog GLBTQ Jamaica on blogger, thanks to the persons involved in the case for allowing me to explore the issue (barring making too public the gruesome details in avoiding being indelicate). I also shared some tips I had prepared in a previous entry on this blog following some Facebook fallout involving young gay men in Kingston. Contrary to popular notions, the discrimination against homosexuality comes not only from heterosexuals but also from sexual minorities themselves. It is virtually impossible for someone raised in a culture as intensely intolerant to homosexuals as Jamaica’s culture is and not have that same intolerance deeply ingrained. Thus, regardless of one’s sexual orientation, most Jamaicans carry the burden of prejudice against homosexuality in varying forms.

Thus the challenges I tried to expound on above, navigating MSM life is not easy here but for those of us who are still around (Thank God) and have the experience we must not only sit on that experience and be cocky about it but also share it with our younger counterparts, after all isn’t it the overall improvement of the quality of life what we seek here?

here are some recent suggestions I added on Facebook, some were from a previous entry on FB fallouts, adjust them as you may see fit:

FIRSTLY work with your INSTINCTS or gaydar if it doesn't feel right or if you are not sure of the individual, DO NOT GO THERE (even if their "member" is big or body looks good) I know the thrill of the hunt can be tempting but if you do decide to push ahead then .........

1) Get to know the party(ies) on the other line as BEST as possible i.e. more relevant info, real name, sexual preference etc do not just settle for photos especially dick shots, those are the alluring agents to get you hooked.

2) Cross question or revisit information that you are not clear on with the person(s) but do so cleverly, not to deceive but for your own confirmation

3) Literally archive your online convos with the party(ies) if you are unsure of their motives via the chat mechanisms or copy and paste them to a blank word doc or notepad

4) Verify if possible knowledge of the person(s) by others in the community if they are newbies the cross questioning point above should be used regularly .... make sure you are getting the truth

5) Decide on what clothing and colour or change colours previously agreed to if you are not sure of the individual you are going to meet

6) Study your surroundings when there and get there early, make note of markers etc

7) Find an open area such as a park for the first meeting preferably instead of a home or hotel so as to avoid any untoward attack and that too can avoid the need to get into the sack too quickly even if it is a nice future fuckbuddy

8) Plan your possible route(s) of escape if necessary, wear adequate clothing that will not impede you

9) Have a weapon of some sort or maze that can create a distraction then escape as quickly as possible

10) For the first meeting try to go as light as possible NO COSTLY items on you such as jewelry, brand clothes or shoes, GO LIGHT AS possible if unsure

11) Have a trusted friend accompany you if possible and have them away from the actual meeting spot but make sure they can see you

12) Make a call if needed to the person(s) who followed you and keep the line open so they can hear your conversation and call for help elsewhere if needed

13) If possible and where necessary have this TRUSTED third party/witness capture the moment via video or stream so as to make sure it is an authentic meeting/hookup

14) IF NEEDS BE or the situation is so dire try to cleverly (not easy to do) distract the perpetrator(s) by telling them you have an STD (NOT HIV) as that may have a psychological impact on them, it has worked in cases I have seen before

15) EVEN during the ordeal see if you can plan your escape, so if you were forced to do any oral sex for e.g and you saw a route or way out bite the fucker and run!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (although in such tense moments one can get nervous and loose thought)

16) Pay close attention to the weakest person in the group IF IT IS A GROUP ATTACK play on them if you can it may work in your favour, best way to escape sometimes is to let them argue and then you BOLT for your life >>>>self preservation dis name

17) Long term take self defense classes if needed

Peace and tolerance

H

Should we care about dancehall acts & rumours of gaydom?

I say yes in a sense as effeminacy, hyper-masculinity and related aesthetics come fresh to mind for me on the back drop of public homophobia. 

With the tired ass homo-sensationalism that is spewed from mainstream print/electronic media these days one would at a glance want to ignore them just for some sanity but when one examines the fact that these dancehall acts inadvertently end up becoming "role models" for young ones especially we cannot ignore their alleged "back door" shenanigans coupled with our national psyche towards machismo, male homosexuality and especially effeminacy (the proof of you being a battyman). 

Rumours have always surrounded some acts in the business for years with Elephant Man in particular, this post was generated on his latest troubles as in recent days ZIP 103FM reported on April 24 that:

"Earlier today, a number of local websites have been reporting that Dancehall artiste Elephant Man was allegedly caught in his pool with 6 members of the gay community.

It has been alleged that the artiste was caught by his gardener at about 11pm last night after hearing some female voices coming from the pool house.

Reports are that when the gardener went to investigate to make sure there was no intruder on the premises, he saw what he claims to be a bit of blood on a white sheet before the door.

He claims to have entered through the door and saw men dressed in female clothing and a man fitting the description of the artiste.

However, there has been no official report of this incident and all efforts to contact the artiste have been unsuccessful.

So, keep it ziplocked as we seek to bring you more on the developments of this story."

ENDS

Now he plans to sue the station as reported by the Star News, funny too that the Star itself missed this one and was first by ZIP FM instead as they usually are the ones to break such suss as it were in the feverish bid to sell papers, we all know that once it's a gay themed story as a headline the papers fly off the shelves. They published this today:

Ele upset over gay post - Plans to sue local radio station

Following an article posted on the website of a popular local radio station, dancehall artiste Elephant Man says he intends to take legal action.

The article, headlined 'Elephant Man caught with gay men in his pool', alleges that Elephant Man's gardener walked in on the artiste who was at the time sharing the company of men dressed in female clothing.

News of the controversial post quickly began to spread to several websites, the post itself receiving over 2,000 hits in less than an hour on the local radio station's website.

When contacted by THE STAR for comment, Elephant Man in a clearly upset tone of voice said, "How can a radio station like that put that on a website? Elephant Man is suing for bad publicity. How can a man like me wey have 35 pickney, be involved in things like that? How dat drop een? Look how much real fish out deh wey dem fi guh talk bout," he said.

The artiste also refuted claims that the radio station made any attempt to contact him before posting the article.

tarnish mi image

"Nuhbody nuh contact mi from there (the radio station). Bout dem try get to me and it nuh work. How you (THE STAR) contact mi and get me? And mi nah contact dem because a dem violate mi so a dem fi contact mi. Somebody there don't like Elephant Man and a try tarnish mi image," he said.

According to Elephant Man, he has not been to his house on the hill for over a year and he does not have a gardener because the house is under renovation. He revealed that he was in the process of making preparations for his daughter's birthday celebration and was not even in the area.

"You cannot get up and put things like that pon a website bout a artiste when yu know inna yu heart sey nuttin nuh guh suh. Suh when me sue dem, nobody nuh sey me wicked because dem get up and a mislead mi fans, a big luuu ... how that come about?," Elephant Man said.

As for his fans, Elephant Man says, "jus gwaan hol' di faith cause nuttn nuh guh suh. Suh jus gwaan pray an God wi see mi tru."

ENDS

As dancehall acts maintain the status-quo of hyper-masculinity, gangsterism and related aesthetics in the public eye through their music behind closed doors is another matter and this case though not confirmed to be so should not be simply overlooked, the gentleman in question has several anti-homosexual songs in his repertoire and has faced some strong opposition via the stop murder music campaigns over the years. Lest we forget he was accused by another dancehall act in 2009 of being a "fish" a colloquial term for gay man and that created a fire storm between the two, whether it was designed to attract attention to themselves as a form of manufactured controversial to raise visibility is another matter, second tiered DJs tend to go after more established ones to get attention by raising controversial accusations as a part of marketing gimmickry.

See: Elephant Man called a "Fish" in dancehall rivalry

But to promote hate and deadly prescriptions for perceived homosexuals especially for those who are effeminate as that is the marker used to identify and out them is one thing but to practice the same behind closed doors is sheer hypocrisy. Can we now begin to deduce after all these years that even the producers, artistry repertoire agents and song writers only seek to play on the national homo-negative psyche to make millions at the expense of us relatively out gay and bisexual men via local standards who are secure in the knowledge of our own sexuality? then we are punished by homophobic violence and a tacitly supporting religious right movement.

"Gay" is just too girly, downlow is better to hide in.

This could be another arm of the cold war or struggle between the down low sections of the MSM populations who deny their own identity or at least refuse to label themselves gay as it comes with too much weight that challenges Jamaica's understanding of masculinity. In the Star article it proves thus where Elephant Man is reported to ask how he as man could have 35 children and be involved in homosexual acts? so the "stud factor" is to be the determinant marker for proof of heterosexuality, that one can impregnate women at a whim and that is enough to show one is not gay. Be fruitful and multiply I suppose.

Down-low as cool in media ............... 

Sadly the gay/bi and increasingly mainstream entertainment industries themselves have also helped to fuel this down-low phenomenon as OK by presenting it as normative in a sense and giving it credence while associating masculinity as the major qualifying agent to hit it and run, merging it with gangsterism and smoothing it over with music predominantly rap. Even so called gay rappers come with this over-hyped image of masculinity but with a same gender loving twist but it wouldn't be rap if it got all effeminate themes as its core as is seen in the house music or ballroom scenes.

Some questions to ponder:

1) Where will the double standards end?

2) How many more hints to dancehall acts must we continue to have similar to this?

3) Have we forgotten the allegations of major names in the business on the so called Ambassador Peter King tapes? ......... that today have remained hidden from the public's scrutiny

4) Is the public not phased by this allegation to Ele given that it is an open secret that hyper-masculine types are involved in homosexuality?

5) Do we have to wait until a video or photos turn up before we just get the truth and hence live it?

Then there is the business of psychological control associated with power differentials and masculinity or projected "strength" over another, dancehall acts amass to themselves plenty of adoration and are in awe by their followers and sometime large all male entourages separate and apart from the female groupies. It would not surprise me to learn that sexual contact also occurs between those male populated groups and any popular star. The unbridled power that these stars are awash with can lead to anything in my view just at a layman's glance when compared to how quickly some of these same hyper-masculine types also are ready to get down in a "gay for pay" transaction yet openly deny being gay when confronted or in a group setting so as not to look or deflect any perception of such in the slightest. 

Stories of persons hanging around at recording studios as well for that chance to be with certain stars or to even get an opportunity to voice a track are an open secret in the music world. These same gay for pay brothers (usually between other hyper-masculine types) also do so as payback for protection or access to the star in question, to be seen with a popular star brings prestige and some would do anything for that. 

The same sex contact in hyper-masculine terms however from my experience is not as romantic or subtle, a bit impersonal and not as cuddly as gay or bisexual men who do not have the pressure of living a lie to others everyday and are in the public's gaze or are innately attracted to each other. They tend to also act out the aura of hetero normative dominance in sexual roles and even positions, certain parts of the body must not be touched when it comes to the dominant partner as any act that seems to even allude to a passive hint is resisted and can lead to a violent reaction which can explain or slightly confirm the gay on gay violence with disastrous consequences that sometimes play out in the public domain. Some men will literally dictate how the act will be conducted and insist on no anal touching, fondling or caresses. He is not a woman. Questions of orientation come in here versus control, desire and adaptation following same sex experimentation hence using it to make money as well or gain material wealth.

Effeminate allure

As to Ele's supposed romp with drag queens this can be a representative hint to those hyper-masculine brothers who prefer a kind of behavioural bisexual element where feminized aesthetics in a man is the aphrodisiac that is derived from the otherwise hidden same sex attraction. We may never know the truth of this or the other allegations of other acts that turn up every now and again but it certainly has brought the discourse about thugs on the downlow.

It was only in February of this year we saw a prominent area leader finding his alleged same sex activities landing him in trouble and the down low matters coming to light as would be gang members had to "give up the booty" to qualify for membership.

CLICK HERE for more from GLBTQJA

Gay/bi celebs locally all got to come out one day sooner or later or else exploitation or victimization will continue as this latest episode seems to allude to.

Peace and tolerance

H

May 7th for UNIBAM Supreme Court Challenge in Belize

The United Belize Advocacy Movement development was inspired by the implementation of the Multi-Centric Study in 2005 for sex workers and men who have sex with men. Paul Edwards, then, epidemiologists for the Ministry of Health brought down Dr. Chad Martin from the CDC to explain the concept of an (MSM) or men who have sex with men organization. As a result, discussions started between persons like Alex Avalos and Fernando Novelo to develop concepts of names, but it was Alex Avalos who developed and strengthen the letterhead and other many nameless persons that led the development of name UNIDAD 96 as a group in Orange Walk. 

With analysis, work proceeded to develop objectives of the group, an MSM HIV/AIDS Analysis, along with community conversations to add substance to the ideas that were brainstormed informally. During this time, current president, Caleb Orozco was working for PASMO as a health educator with support from UNFPA OPEC project and he use to do group sessions at Fernando Novelo and Alex Avalos house in Orange Walk. It was Arnulfo Kantun, though, who helped facilitate the space with Caleb Orozco to cement the present day name UniBAM. A meeting on 16th February, 2006 with 10 other persons from Belize City and Orange Walk was held at the Channel Five building on Coney Drive that was the National Development Foundation of Belize building. The group present wanted a national name reflective of Belize's cultural diversity. They actually borrowed Alliance Against AIDS activity to get the name change. . .........

Fast forward to the challenge:

The stage is set for one of the biggest Supreme Court Cases in memory, that’s UNIBAM’s constitutional challenge to section 53 of Belize’s criminal which outlaws sex between men. The actual court hearing is set for May 7 to 10th, but today, the case was called up before Justice Michelle Arana for case management.

Caleb Orozco, the president of UNIBAM, who’s spearheading the challenge, was at court today along with his attorney Lisa Shoman, and attorneys for the Council of Churches and the Government of Belize. They held an audience with Justice Arana in her chambers, in which technical legal issues were ironed out on both sides.

The news coming out of that meeting is that the case has been moved over to the CJ’s Court – and it will be full of the highest flying legal eagles were likely to ever see packed into one courtroom. Shoman told us about the international attorneys added to their side of the case.

Lisa Shoman - Attorney for Caleb Orosco

 

"It's what it is now. The case is going to trial. We've been notified that the Chief Justice will be hearing the case on May 7th to 10th and we were just finalizing because the churches wanted some more time to put in their written submission. The claimant, Caleb Orosco, has filed written submissions. The human rights interested party have filed written submissions. The attorney general asked for more time and they will have to file by the 30th and the churches will be given until May 3rd. Trial days are set - it is May 7th to 10th."

Daniel Ortiz
"Ma'm, I also just got some information that the International interested parties have retained the services of an attorney from Trinidad and Lord Peter Goldsmith from the UK, can you confirm for us?"

Lisa Shoman
"I can tell you that the claimant has a team of attorneys which has one attorney from the UWI, Mr. Christopher Hamel-Smith, Queen's Council from Trinidad is also appearing along with myself, along with Simeon Sampson. So we are all Caribbean people and I understand that the Commonwealth Lawyers Association, Human Dignity Trust and the International Society of Jurists who are the human rights interested parties have asked Godfrey Smith and Lord Peter Goldsmith to appear on their behalf."

We also spoke to Orozco, who told us that the public and media are confusing to issues, human rights, and human rights enforcement.

He told us that everyone in Belize should enjoy the same rights and freedoms. According to him, the problem is that the LGBT community is often victimized, and their rights are not enforced at an institutional level.

Caleb Orosco - Challenging Belize's Constitution

 

"The issue for LGBT citizens is an issue of rights enforcement. It's not an issue of recognition of human rights. It’s not about special rights and it’s not about adding rights. The issue for us is recognizing that Belize has very strong human rights framework in terms of all the international treaties insights and Belize fundamental rights and freedom have very strong principles in reference to the fundamental rights and freedom within it's own constitution and national laws. The problem at the moment right now is the domestication of some of these international treaties applications. The other problem is the recognition. Not just as a matter of paper but as a matter of practice but the fundamental rights and freedom of our LGBT citizens are the same as our Belizeans. So what we are working on is to address the rights enforcement issue as it pertains to systematic responses to the concerns to the specific needs of the population."

And if Lord Peter Goldsmith sounds familiar to you he should. He’s the Queen’s Counsel from the UK who the Ashcroft Alliance has retained twice for representation in relation to hearings in the Appeal Court.

also see previous entries from sister blog GLBTQJA

UNIBAM Gay Rights Case Slated for May 7-10, 2013

THE UNIBAM CASE explained

IRS Revokes NARTH tax exempt status ................

A recent homosexuality seminar (see ad below) that was hosted by theologian and talk show host Reverend Clinton Chisholm and which also had as guest speaker Counseling Psychologist Mrs Joan Pinkney used among other sources flawed US noted National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuality conclusions to suggest all kinds of anti homosexual posturings. Bearing in mind that the group has run into serious challenges in recent times with some of its own researchers who took them to court regarding alleged misuse of studies done on reparative therapy etc.

For example the age old narrative that lesbians become so due to a lack of a male father figure was used or neglect even if the father is present in the home

Now comes news that the once powerful NARTH has lost its tax exempt status and will now have to pay up on any donation it gets.

One wonders eh?

Ex-Gay watch reported recently:

The National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuality (NARTH) has lost their tax-exempt status, for failing to file form 990 three years in a row. Dr. Warren Throckmorton confirmed this with the Internal Revenue Service and reported it on his site on March 12.

“Even though the full name of the organization is not listed, the Employee Identification Number and address match up with the 2009 990 form. A call to the IRS also confirmed it.

NARTH’s website advises prospective donors that their donations will be tax deductible but it appears such deductions after September 15, 2012 may not be allowed.”

This means that donations to NARTH will no longer be tax-deductible. The IRS says their status was revoked in September of 2012; it can take a little time before the information becomes available to the public, which is why this is only making news now. NARTH has not responded to request for comment from Throckmorton, and there is no evidence that NARTH has tried to get their status reinstated.  To do so would require starting the application process over from scratch.

Some commenters on Warren’s blog observed that NARTH has continued to claim on its website that donations are tax-deductible, despite IRS assurances to Throckmorton that they are not.  One commenter, Roy Peterson, received the following response to an inquiry via email:

“We’re working on that. The information provided from the IRS does not match our own records. We believe it to be a misscommunication [sic] and have no reason to suspect that we won’t continue to operate under the 501 non profit tax deduction.”

However, a follow-up with the IRS by Warren confirmed that the organization had indeed lost its status as a nonprofit.

NARTH has existed for decades as virtually the only secular reparative therapy organization in an industry made up largely of conservative Christian denominations. On the surface, they seemed to offer a “scientific” approach that contrasted with religious efforts to become “ex-gay” through prayer and other rituals. However, NARTH’s underpinnings have always been religious. Joseph Nicolosi, who has been a prominent NARTH figure for decades, is a devout Catholic. He helped popularize the phrase “The opposite of homosexuality isn’t heterosexuality – it’s holiness.” NARTH’s “research” has always been lacking, using such dated and disproved hypotheses as the “absent father/overbearing mother” explanation for homosexuality. They have also consistently and deliberately misused the results of important, scientifically valid studies to justify bigotry and civil inequality against the queer community.

Shoddy scholarship and thinly-veiled religious antipathy for gays have been benchmarks of NARTH from the beginning. Although they’ve been the go-to group for all ex-gay organizations that want to claim that science is on their side, NARTH is little more than a cottage industry – a conference they held in Philadelphia a couple years ago yielded about 40 attendees.

At this point one can only speculate about why they failed to file for three years in a row, but this incident bears a striking resemblance to what happened to Peter LaBarbera’s organization, American for Truth About Homosexuality (AFTAH). He too failed to file form 990 for three consecutive years, and AFTAH’s tax-exempt status was also revoked by the IRS. At the time, blogger Timothy Kincaid commented that for nonprofits, every expense and donation must be listed. This means that donor names must be disclosed, and all of this information becomes available to the public. A copy of a nonprofit’s tax return is made available simply upon request, with all of this information.

“990′s provide a good deal of information: major donors, expenditures, grants, officers, compensation, programs, etc. And, most likely, Peter had something which he simply could not publicly reveal.

I’m guessing it was ‘major donor’ info. We would, of course, leap on disclosures from ‘legitimate’ organizations and Peter may have had no choice.

Going forward, AFTAH will have to decide on their corporate structure. They will have to file assomething. I wouldn’t be surprised if some new entity is created.”

NARTH will have to make these decisions as well, if they are to remain “in business,” so to speak. Who knows if the things they wanted to keep hidden (if that is indeed the case here) for the past three years will come to light some day soon.

Overall, this is a major blow to the ex-gay industry in America. If they become a defunct organization, the “studies” and “research” attributed to them will become that much more worthless, even to those most vehemently opposed to equality.

ENDS

Below is a video of Dr Lisa Diamond who claimed NARTH distorted her research - 

Lisa M. Diamond, Ph.D., is an Associate Professor of Psychology and Gender Studies in the Department of Psychology at the University of Utah. She has won a number of awards for her work.
In 2000, Dr. Diamond published a study, "Sexual identity, attractions, and behavior among young sexual minority women over a 2 year period."

This study was distorted by the so-called ex-gay therapy group NARTH. They claimed that Dr. Diamond's work shows that sexual orientation is "amenable to change."

Dr. Diamond also produced a second study, "Female Bisexuality From Adolescence to Adulthood: Results From a 10-Year Longitudinal Study" in Developmental Psychology (2008, Vol. 44, No 1., 5-14).

NARTH recently cited this study to support its anti-scientific belief that homosexuality is a mental disorder that should be treated.

Some religious right lies about the lgbt community ...................

Subject to periodical adjustments as they increase 

1. Homosexuality is a lifestyle more harmful than cigarette smoking.

2. Gay men have a short life span.

3. The gay and lesbian community have a high rate of domestic violence.

4. Unhealthy behaviours i.e. substance abuse, promiscuous sexual behaviour  are indicative of the gay or lesbian orientation.

5. Gay men molest children at a high rate.

6. Gays and lesbians want to silence Christians.

7. Gays and lesbians recruit people, particularly children, to their "lifestyle."

8. Gays and lesbians are following a six-point plan to take over America.

9. Any judge who rules in favour of the gay and lesbian community in a case is an "activist judge."

10. Anal sex is "homosexual behaviour."

11. Robert Spitzer’s study confirms that gays and lesbians can change their orientation.

12. Gays and lesbians want to force acceptance.

13. Gay bowel syndrome is a legitimate medical term.

14. A man who molests a boy or a woman who molests a girl is automatically homosexual.

15. A convenience sample or out-of-date study can be used to generalize about an entire community.

16. The average gay man has many sexual partners.

17. Laws created to protect transgender from discrimination will make it easier for sexual predators to come into women's' bathrooms and locker rooms.

18. Tolerance means acceptance by LGBT lobby standards

19. The LGBT lobby is on an anti-Christ world view and gay Christians do not matter

20. Gay men want to plug every butt in town owned by a man

21. Gay men will apart from anal sex ultimately practice fisting, fishing and felching (a favourite set of blog posts from anti gay activist Dr Wayne West of the JCHS)

22. Homosexual orientation does not exist and is a misnomer used by gay friendly psycho social experts

23. Put children in a same sex school and they may become gay

24. Gay parents will automatically cause the children they adopt to be gay too

25. God hates fags

26. Sodom and Gomorrah was destroyed because of homosexuality

27. Women who become lesbians are so due to the lack of a father figure in their lives (repeated recently at a religious sponsored seminar by a Counseling Psychologist Mrs  Joan Pinkney on April 5, 2013)

28. HIV/AIDS is a gay disease and is punishment from God to stop men from having anal sex

29. Jamaica will be destroyed if we decriminalise buggery

30. More homo-paedophile cases will occur if the buggery law is removed

31. Murders that involve a member of the LGBT community as a victim for the most part are romanticly or jealousy related or caused and not homophobic

Former US 'Ex-Gay' Superstar John Paulk Finally Renounces His 'Ex-Gay' Past

A quick look up north and more proof that this Ex Gay business just does not work.

Paulk Must Now Begin The Hard Work Of Atoning For The Damage He Has Done To LGBT People, And Anne Paulk And The Religious Right Must Stop Peddling The Lie Of The Paulks' "Fairy-Tale 'Ex-Gay' Marriage" Immediately, Says Truth Wins Out. This was the same man who was outed several times before after he supposedly sided with the Ex-Gay movement in the United States, now comes this press release from TWO. Here was one of the last videos exposing his error. (WARNING strong language)

Burlington, Vt. - Truth Wins Out commended former "ex-gay" poster-boy John Paulk for taking an important first step in being honest about who he is, but stated that Paulk must do much more to make up for the damage he, his estranged wife and the Religious Right have done to the LGBT community over the last twenty years.

In a piece in PQ Monthly, Paulk, who has perhaps done more to hurt LGBT families than any other single person in the "ex-gay" industry, states for the record that he no longer endorses efforts to change people's sexuality:

"Until recently, I have struggled all my life in feeling unloved and unaccepted," Paulk said. "I have been on a journey during the last few years in trying to understand God, myself, and how I can best relate to others. During this journey I have made many mistakes and I have hurt many people including people who are close to me. I have also found a large number of people who accept me for who I am regardless of my past, any labels, or what I do."

Paulk continued, "I no longer support the ex-gay movement or efforts to attempt to change individuals - especially teens who already feel insecure and alienated. I feel great sorrow over the pain that has been caused when my words were misconstrued. I have worked at giving generously to the gay community in Portland where I work and live. I am working hard to be authentic and genuine in all of my relationships."

While John Paulk is to be commended, after so many years, for finally being honest, Truth Wins Out believes much more needs to be done. According to Truth Wins Out Executive Director Wayne Besen, "It is not enough to simply send an e-mail that says, 'I'm sorry.' John Paulk must work to atone for the damage he has done to LGBT families by taking a public role in renouncing and working against the harmful 'ex-gay' industry by embarking on a speaking tour to show that he truly has changed. Further, he should advocate for a bill in Oregon that would ban so-called 'reparative therapy' for minors. Only then can he start to repair the damage he has done to countless LGBT people and their families."

John Paulk was at one time the most well known and influential person in the "ex-gay" industry, appearing on the cover of Newsweek with his wife Anne in 1998 under the headline, "Gay For Life?" He was instrumental in forming the Love Won Out "ex-gay" roadshow, which subjected countless LGBT youth and their families to misinformation, indoctrination and lies, and which destroyed many families in the process. In 2000, Wayne Besen, founder of Truth Wins Out, photographed John Paulk coming out of a Washington, DC, gay bar, and the lies began to unravel. Though John resigned from the board of Exodus International following this incident, the Religious Right continued to use the Paulks' story as evidence that the "ex-gay" life was a fairy tale rather than a nightmare, and many LGBT people and their families have been damaged or destroyed over the years as a result.

John and his wife moved to Portland, Oregon, shortly thereafter and lived relatively quiet lives as John built a catering company called Mezzaluna, staffed by curiously attractive gay men. John and Anne didn't really disappear from the "ex-gay" scene, though. John spoke in 2010 at the Evergreen "ex-gay" conference, and in 2012, Anne was a co-founder of the Restored Hope Network, a group of "ex-gay" ministries that defected from Exodus International when Alan Chambers began to tell the truth, that reparative therapy and "ex-gay" ministries do not change anyone's sexuality. Indeed, Anne seemed to double down on the lie at the group's inaugural meeting, telling the crowd:

"I never thought I would be married and the mother of three sons," she told the eager crowd mixed with anti-gay extremists and the hurting parents of gay children.

Anne Paulk continues to propagate a false narrative of her own "ex-gay" life in order to stay in the spotlight and make money off of suffering LGBT people and their families.

During this same time period, Truth Wins Out had been receiving reports that John and Anne Paulk had split up, and that John was living as an out gay man in Portland, frequenting gay bars and propositioning men for sex. In 2012, Truth Wins Out attempted to give Paulk an opportunity to set the record straight and come out with dignity, instead of continuing the lie that his family was an "ex-gay" success story, a narrative that the Religious Right uses to this day. When that offer was ultimately refused, Truth Wins Out released the results of an investigation that showed that ongoing narrative of "ex-gay" healing in the Paulk family was fraudulent, as John had been pursuing relationships with men who worked for him, buying them things and asking them for sexual favors.

Focus On The Family and others on the Religious Right have had ample opportunity to remove the Paulks from their literature and to stop using them as poster children for the lie that "ex-gay" programs work. While John expressed in the recent investigation that he no longer wanted to be associated with his "ex-gay" past, he was unwilling to publicly correct the record, and his estranged wife has continued to peddle their false story to any "ex-gay" charlatans who will listen.

In light of John Paulk's announcement, Truth Wins Out also calls upon Anne Paulk and the rest of the Religious Right to immediately cease using the Paulks' story to sell harmful "ex-gay" therapy to vulnerable people. "Anne Paulk and her Religious Right cohort must immediately cease lying to people about the false 'ex-gay Paulk fairy-tale,'" said Truth Wins Out Associate Director Evan Hurst. "Indeed, both Paulks should become poster children for the very real nightmare that has been the 'ex-gay' experience for so many LGBT people."

Truth Wins Out is a nonprofit organization that fights anti-LGBT extremism. TWO specializes in turning information into action by organizing, advocating and fighting for LGBT equality.

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