Depression & the GLTBQ Community

DEPRESSION AND THE GLBT COMMUNITY

Contributor

This may seem to be the most inopportune time to talk about depression. It is for me because it has been too late for a friend. Hence, this is for the many who are still alive amongst us. When I was a teenager and realized I was gay, it was the most traumatic thing I thought could have happened to me, ever. I was so afraid to talk to anyone about the feelings I was having. I went to one of the traditional high schools that had very good guidance Councillors but I was still afraid of ‘letting out’ the secret I had inside. Although people could have looked at me and wondered if I was gay, my public behaviour to refute such a ‘slant’ taught me to deny the true ‘me’ to myself. It made me very sad. I went to church. I prayed for my ‘sin’ to go away – even before I was sexually active with other men.

It was unrelenting. I became severely depressed. No one could reach through to me. I thought no one else understood what I was going through. I knew no other gay person to talk to. And the bottom line was this: I was afraid of social rejection and potential harm. I even started to entertain thoughts of putting an end to it all.

I turned to myself for help. I started finding ways to help myself from within. I would spend my free time just thinking about my life, what I wanted to become when I left high school. That became my own form of escapism. One thing is certain. I have survived it all. Through the thick and the thin, I made it through the pain and the lack of inner selfworth.

Brothers, sisters, your life is worth more than what you have been ‘cultured’ to believe. You, too, have a right to life. You, too, should feel free to live, to shine, to fly, to smile - and to love. I would like to share with you a few lines from one of my very favourite songs:

“When the shadows are closing in

And your spirit diminishing

Just remember you’re not alone

And love will be there

To guide you home”

I recommend you get a copy of

‘Anytime You Need A Friend’ by

Mariah Carey and listen to this

song carefully in the dark, alone.

I cannot tell you what you will

discover. That part is your fate

and you are the sole bearer of

the key to your destiny.

“Love will make it alright.”

– Mariah Carey

Ways to combat depression, of not prevent it:

1. Reach out and stay connected to supportive people

2. Do things that make you feel good—even when you don’t feel like it

3.Move vigorously during the day—don’t sit for more than an hour

4.Learn about the mood-boosting benefits of omega-3 fats

5. Get a daily dose of sunlight

6. Challenge negative thinking

Ways to reach out:

Look for support from people who make you feel safe and cared for. The person you talk to doesn’t have to be able to fix you; he or she just needs to be a good listener—someone who’ll listen attentively and compassionately without being distracted or judging you.

Make face-time a priority. Phone calls, social media, and texting are great ways to stay in touch, but they don’t replace good old-fashioned in-person quality time.  The simple act of talking to someone face to face about how you feel can play a big role in lifting the fog of depression and keeping it away.

Try to keep up with social activities even if you don’t feel like it. Often when you’re depressed, it feels more comfortable to retreat into your shell, but being around other people will make you feel less depressed.

Find ways to support others. It’s nice to receive support, but research shows you get an even bigger mood boost from providing support yourself. So find ways—both big and small—to help others: volunteer, be a listening ear for a friend, do something nice for somebody.

Care for a pet. While nothing can replace the human connection, pets can bring joy and companionship into your life and help you feel less isolated. Caring for a pet can also get you outside of yourself and give you a sense of being needed—both powerful antidotes to depression.