It is bad we have to put up with homophobic violence as it is over these many years, then having to deal with the disbelief and rejection of such claims by the public and anti gay voices in particular; then we are asked to contend with conflations of such anti gay attacks with intimate partner violence matters that are just as gruesome as anti gay ones are and are used to also dismiss claims of the former and to justify homophobia in a sense and hence rejection of any rights and recognition.
Crisis communication has not been a strong point in public LGBTQ advocacy in Jamaica and so it goes against any push for rights; intimate partner violence is also is a closet of sorts and is not often spoken of publicly; a trend I have been trying to break over these many years when I can as sweeping such matters under the rug or away from open dialogue only causes it to fester and lead to the aforementioned challenges.
also see: GAY & BISEXUAL INTIMATE PARTNER VIOLENCE, HOMOPHOBIC INCIDENTS & CRISIS COMMUNICATION 2014 (wordpress archive blog)
Over time the men were seeing each other at the previous apartment where the victim was residing and the faithful night the weedman (accused) slept over; unbeknownst to the victim the perpetrator had hidden a knife under a pillow, an argument had ensued earlier and both men went to bed in a huff; another argument ensued in the wee hours of the morning and it was at that point it got really physical but not as before. The weedster has raised his hands before but not as this time and the subject of the tussle was a seeming conflation of role playing (sexually), more access to the victim’s house in terms of visits, cash and just general misplaced entitlement that seems to come with these kinds of liaisons.
The men fought, words were said and the weedster held the victim and while threatening to kill all battyman the dardstardly act was done; the victim was left gasping and according to him he managed to call for help from a roommate who was asleep. The nude but clothes carrying perpetrator made good his exit from the apartment claiming he hates battyman and referencing some prior incident with another ‘big man’ who apparently ended ugly as he claimed he was used for sex and possibly abused which is another matter in some of these anger issues evidenced in IPV.
The victim and friend made their way to the nearby University of the West Indies hospital UWHI and sought and received fast treatment so as to stop the haemorrhaging and close the open wound; a short surgery procedure was done and he was left to rest for some hours. The police were also notified and a preliminary report taken on the victim’s behalf; caring co-workers and management of his employ also came to his comfort to provide support. Thankfully this one ended up with a life spared but many others have not been so fortunate; case in point the Dean Moriah matter as we subsequently found out it was not a homophobic matter but also a hookup just gone bad similar to the Peter King matter as well and indeed Michael Melbourne’s surprise killing in his apartment as well in 2001.
The entitlement/unsure/bi-struggling thug problem has contributed to such IPV outcomes and my own case I have encountered such as well, I have had to literally pull my machete in a couple instances towards men who feel they are more man than I am and so I (like some other more effeminate brothers) must subscribe to their demands and assume a hetero-normative submissive role of a woman who must take on domestic chores with acceding to their laziness and such. Real men in their eyes are supposed to be the cock of the walk and not bow down to another even as financially they do not have the where it all to take care of business but have a ‘you have to mind me’ approach to such relationships/liaisons. One could pin internalized homophobia as well in this as some men just either in fear or confusion conflate effeminacy, gay sex and role play as items to attack his ego or machismo; when you wrap that up in the highly sexualised society we live in and the undue pressure placed on men to be men then it is no wonder we have all these challenges; including the high number of us as a marginalized species in prison.
When last I spoke to the recovering man he was ok, he found a new flat and has had some wonderful support from his co workers and bosses as well thus far.
Peace & tolerance
H
also see:
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