Oh lord, the ‘area man’ problem again

You may have seen references in previous posts to a phenomenon known as ‘area man’ which effectively means men who are either gay, bisexual, pass-throughs or homo-curious and who reside in the same geographical zone or very close to another gay/bi man. The closeness is further complex by a class division if one is in an middle class neighbourhood in the same zone and the ‘area man’ is from a nearby so called ghetto or unplanned aka squatter settlement and usually carry a hyper-masculine disposition or the proverbial ‘heaviots’ ‘homo-thug’ or ‘trade’ wherein some of us have a hankering for. Problem with such diverse polarities in same gender liaisons are that the proximity quotient can become problematic and an entitlement attitude comes to dominate the relationship; persons may feel that sex should be spontaneous seeing whilst keeping the secret or on the downlow access ought to be easier; demands for money or kind are or should be expected as the freeloader mentality comes into play as well.

Lord knows I had my share of those while I was living in Campbell Town then Franklyn Town and Portmore respectively with men who liked my ability to run the effeminacy and masculine spectrum made their positions known while requesting sex, money, companionship otherwise not possibly available in their own homes or living communities. Effeminacy or the lack thereof is a key prerequisite for the attraction by hyper-masculine types, they fear any form of suspicion being involved in gay activities or associated with a ‘battyman’ so keeping it ‘all man’ is key and often reiterated verbally every now and again.

A young man in his twenties learnt a lesson recently and shared his story by the blog hotline of an ordeal he had with an ‘area man’ and also on the strength of a previous post on the issue. He met a thug who he liked and vice versa but the dude lived in a nearby area and was unemployed, masculine acting, nicely endowed but bisexual as well. While the thug liked him he also was clear as to his ‘babymother’ who is supposedly obligated to service (the first sign of trouble for me). infrequent but short visits soon became more repetitious with more intimacy being added to the mix, with that comes growing demands for financial assistance to buy either food items, weed and it got to a point of clothes and a phone request over time. But the visits started to get sporadic and unannounced with sometimes late hour surprises. With each visit some sexual activity is expected to follow even if the man is not interested at that present time and he had been dating or seeing another man who he tried to curtail his visits so as not to clash with the ‘area man’ party to avoid any challenges. But the third party’s presence or lack thereof was not the straw that broke the camel’s back instead more territorialism and entitlement by the ‘area man’ which became increasingly problematic, so much so that it became nearly violent between the two as the area man felt he was being short changed or would be left out in the cold as the man’s attitude had changed in relation tithe warmth he would encounter with visits. The man reported that he tried to stop the visits for a while so as to let tensions cool but the guy kept turning up on his bicycle sometimes unannounced, usually smoking and his decibels in calling very loudly.

It is situations like this that indeed sometimes lead to problems over time including homophobic appearing incidents and murders which h is why it is so important to get to the heart of the issues before pronouncing on a matter despite the ghastly nature of it, what are the causations or triggers?

So long as the 'two Jamaicas' conditions exist I guess we are going to have to contend with the entitlement issues, downlow phenomenon and such will abound but how do we contend or unlearn some of this. Hidden in some of this is this notion that gay men or MSM who are relatively stable somehow have money to throw away that he (the thug type) is entitled to it somehow as he is a real man than others and in a homo-negative environment so good ‘gansgtas’ are hard to find; so when you do you have to pay for it and like all scarce commodities the price is high. These ‘area man’ know the ropes and use it to their advantage. The liaison has slowed since the report was made and the ‘area man’ upon realising his prospects may not produce the results but I suggested he the impacted man consider relocating in the long run; one cannot be sure if the lull period as it were will end and the repeated visits will recommence, and a smoothing over that some of these guys are good at will come into play.

More anon

Peace & tolerance

H