A Mothership Blog Post (add this blog to your bookmarks)
It is generally considered good manners to present your partner with a clean bottom before getting fucked. However, is it necessary to clean yourself internally by douching before a nice juicy cock finds itself up there? Not always, and some, including the charity Gay Men Fighting Aids, would advise not at all.
The fact is that douching can irritate the lining of your rectum and bowel and make it more susceptable to infection and injury, even if you only use plain warm water*. The lower bowel and rectum are coated with anal mucus which help to protect you and to lubricate the passing of faeces.
When you douche, you wash away this protective coating, and this means that your rectum has no barrier to protect it from injury, infection or irritation caused by the fucking.
The primary purpose of your bottom is to pass faeces from the body (really!). As you digest food and it passes through the digestive system, slowly more and more water is absorbed from the faeces by the bowel and this absorption process even continues in the rectum.
Importantly, douching can make the transmission of STDs and HIV more likely because without the anal mucus the direct contact of the sperm or infectious agent with the lining of the rectum will make it more readily absorbed. Also, there is a greater chance of injury and the resultant small cuts and abrasions give an easy route into the bloodstream.
Won’t anal sex be a bit messy if he hasn’t douched?
The main thing is that the passive partner empties his bowel by taking a dump before sex (he can wash his bottom externally after) - then, most often any penetrative sex is fairly clean.
Bear in mind that even douching isn’t 100% clean - in fact the water can cause more faecal matter to break free or dilute. The fact is, you’re fucking his arse - what do you expect? As one of our members said on the Mothership gay forums “If you play with fire you’re going to get burnt, if you play with bums don’t be surprised when you get shit”!
That’s disgusting!
Is it? Poo is just a natural product of his body. If you can desensitise yourself a little to the natural feelings of revulsion that are programmed into us, you’ll find it won’t put you off so much. It is important that both partners are comfortable about not douching - the passive guy may be put off as much as the active guy because he may feel humiliated or worried that his bottom isn’t clean inside.
It’s still disgusting!
Do you enjoy rimming? Fact: even if you rim a spotlessly clean arse you are still consuming microscopic traces of his shit, and if he hasn’t washed his bum you’re eating a lot more, so it is a matter of perspective. As a side issue if you do rim other guys you should get hep A and hep B vaccinations from your local GUM clinic.
No, I will carry on douching (and I’ll never rim again!)
Fair enough. Many guys have douched successfully for years with no problems and if your partner uses a condom you protect yourself anyway from the most serious STDs. There are also times when you may be particularly anxious to create a good first impression - like a first date - and will only be comfortable if you douche. Understood, but in that case use a condom - it is the combination of barebacking and douching that is particularly dangerous - and add into the mix sleeping with a new partner and you could be putting yourself at greater risk of HIV.
When you douche be very careful if you use a shower head - the pressure and temperature can be unpredictable. Preferably use a hand held bulb douche or a gravity fed douche. Never use any detergent or soap as this may irritate your sensitive insides - only plain warm water. As I’ve stated, know that you are at greater risk of picking up STDs and HIV after douching, so condoms are even more important. Finally, use a gentle lubricant that does not irritate your arse.
Informed Choices
Enough has been written elsewhere about the dangers of germs and hepatitis A and B from poo, and of not using a condom. You can make your own informed choices. If you’re not informed you can get informed at the excellent GMFA website.
by David Abrehart
* Source GMFA
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